McBeardo Movie Marathon Pic(k)s
You Get to Program 13 Films into a Perfect 24 Hour Marathon. So DO It, Already!
The mighty Ant Timpson who, among countless other cult film mitzvahs, runs New Zealand’s 24Hour Movie Marathon is concocting something spectacular for the event’s upcoming ten year anniversary. 
Each marathon is screened on film for an audience in a theater. The schedule consists of 13 films, assembled with an eye on the following:
1. The Flow
2. The Pre & Post breakfast film
3. The Opener
4. The Closer
5. The Sucker Punch
6. Crazy Juxtaposition
Now, Ant and his cohorts do a smashing job with their marathon, but I got to wondering: What if I - McBeardo! Number One! - picked the pics?
My fantasy roster of 13, scheduled to play in this order, follows.
- Mad Monster Party (1967)
- The Strange Case of Señor Computer (2000)
- The Trial of Billy Jack (1974)
- Lemora the Lady Dracula (1973)
- Screwballs (1984)
- Head (1968)
- Forbidden Zone (1980)
- Inside (2007)
- Sleepaway Camp (1983)
- Hardcore (1979)
- The Island of Dr. Moreau (1996)
- Coonskin (1975)
- Farewell Uncle Tom (1971)
I don’t know exactly where I’d schedule breakfast, but figuring on a noon-to-noon running time, I guess we’d all be dining with Brando, Val Kilmer, and Hyena-Swine.
What would be your perfect 13-film marathon schedule?
Leave a comment and let me know.
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Comments ( 21 )
Damn but my love for Italian directors, zombies, and Canadian body horror really reeks in this lineup …
Hell, we’ll just start by rounding out nearly my entire personal top ten with The Monster Club. I don’t like to celebrate without a nod to Vincent Price
Holy Trinity: Night, Dawn, Day of the (Living) Dead.
Carrie
Cronenberg, 1-2! Rabid and They Came From Within
Halloween & Hell Night
Fulci 3-fer: Zombie, Gates of Hell, The Beyond
Phantom of the Paradise
Damn it, I snuck two Brian De Palma movies in there and didn’t even intend it! I’d hear about busting up the Fulci trilogy by replacing either of the second two with Suspiria
Minister of Sinister said at
Jul 24 09 at
1:36 pm
Ok, off the top of my head:
1-Great White
2-Wacky World of Dr. Morgus
3-Frankenstein Meets the Space Monster
4.Dinosaurus
5-Attack of the Mushroom People
6-Used Cars
7-The Giant Claw
8-The Naked Prey
9-Pray for the Wildcats
10-The Alligator People
11-Breakout with Chuck Bronson
12-Grizzly
13.True Grit
Bwana said at
Jul 24 09 at
1:42 pm
OK, here goes:
Fantastic Planet
TerrorVision
Slime City
Tombs of the Blind Dead
The Grapes of Death
Strip-O-Rama
Zombi 2
Suspiria
Theater of Blood
Deep Throat
My Breakfast with Blassie
Sweet Sweetback’s Bad-Ass Song
The Boys from Brazil
B-Sol said at
Jul 24 09 at
1:48 pm
Excellent choices there. I’ve seen all except SENOR COMPUTER, and it’s such a personal list, I think mine would have a few in common but being that I’m primarily a horror fan, I’d include more of that genre.
That being said, my 2¢:
INSIDE is the best example of modern French horror. Excellent choice. Somehow, the French are reviving the horror genre. Go Figure.
SLEEPAWAY CAMP - That final scene is still effective even today. I’d probably include another from the slasher genre - HALLOWEEN being the best (by far) but too well-known. I’d choose JUST BEFORE DAWN - a movie I seem to like more than most other people.
I’d replace COONSKIN with HEAVY TRAFFIC… I always felt that was Bakshi’s best movie (not that there’s a whole lot to choose from)…
For teen sex comedy, I have no problem with SCREWBALLS but that’s another example where the originators of the genre - ANIMAL HOUSE & PORKYS- are so heads and tails above any followers, it’s hard to choose anything else. Both are also very “mainstream” so I’m not even sure they count as cult movies.
I’d also include an Italian horror film from the 80’s. Probably Fulci’s THE BEYOND or THE GATES OF HELL.
HEAD and FORBIDDEN ZONE cover “weirdness” pretty thoroughly. Hard to argue with those.
For the mainstream sleaze category, I’d replace HARDCORE with CRUISING. MIDNIGHT COWBOY is too good a movie and almost quaint nowadays and Pacino all dressed up in leather gear is too damn funny.
I’d also love to squeeze in THE HOWLING, REANIMATOR and REPO MAN. but then the marathon would last for many more days.
Roger Ebert’s utter contempt for FAREWELL UNCLE TOM is hilarious. Everyone should read his review then rent it immediately. How is it I never found it as insulting as the inventor of Superwoman?
John B said at
Jul 24 09 at
1:58 pm
12:00-1:45 Witchcraft Through the Ages (1922)
1:50-3:15 Little Red Riding Hood and the Monsters (1962)
3:20-4:50 Mr. Sardonicus (1961)
4:55-6:25 Joysticks (1983)
6:30-7:30 The Films of Nanny Lynn (Unknown)
7:35-9:05 Madman (1982)
9:10-10:40 The World’s Greatest Sinner (1962)
10:45-12:40 The Savage is Loose (1974)
12:45-2:05 Jesus Christ Superstar (1973)
2:10-3:25 Cruising (1980)
3:30-5:05 Piranha (1978)
5:10-6:40 Mystics in Bali (1981)
6:45-8:00 Teen Lust (1979)
8:05-10:35 Caligula (1979)
10:40-12:00 Stunt Rock (1978)
Bobby Weird said at
Jul 24 09 at
2:04 pm
I like the pre-70s tilt of Bwana’s list. I don’t go back there enough, and I need to do it more.
mcbeardo said at
Jul 24 09 at
2:09 pm
TERROR VISION deserves a fuck-load of cult fandom. An overlooked treasure if ever there was one. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0092074/
mcbeardo said at
Jul 24 09 at
2:10 pm
1) Motel Hell (Started my love affair with Horror when I was 5, plus they planted people and popped their heads off with a tractor - how can you not call that entertainment?)
2) Piranha - take that, Jaws
3) Nightmare on Elm Street - started my appreciation for Robert Englund…I already had a crush on him from ‘V’
4) Fido (Twisted play on the Boy and his Dog theme - awesome)
5) Sleepaway Camp ( can you believe my grandma got his one for me? I love my grandma)
6) Zombi 2 - Shark + zombie + win
7) Behind the Mask - How to be a serial killer Mockumentary.
Phantasm - Who wasn’t scared the first ime they heard BOOOOOOOOOOY?
9) Alien/Aliens. Do I really have to comment?
10) Re-Animator - another gimmie
11) Salems Lot - used to watch this with my dad. It’s still awesome.
12) Night of the Living Dead - not a horror marathon without this. 1968 version prefered, 1990 acceptable
13) Maximum Overdrive - Go ahead, laugh…when your family owns car junkyards, it makes this movie much more awesome.
That Ghoul Ava said at
Jul 24 09 at
3:24 pm
I am, and have always been, a fan of MAXIMUM OVERDRIVE.
“Who Made Who” is my favorite AC/DC song - actually, it’s one of my favorite rock songs, period - and I also love the sequence of the kid on the bike surveying the incoming mayhem to the instrumental “Chase the Ace”.
There is ONLY the 1968 NOTLD.
mcbeardo said at
Jul 24 09 at
3:29 pm
I love the McBeardo line-up. Beyond compare.
My decadent girly ME fest:
Ladies & Gentleman, The Fabulous Stains
Umbrellas of Cherbourg
Superstar: The Karen Carpenter Story
Foxes
The Trouble with Angels
Audrey Rose
The Bad Seed
Female Trouble
Rock & Roll High School
Lord Love a Duck
Strait-jacket
The Girl Can’t Help It
Teeth
Penny Fine said at
Jul 24 09 at
6:20 pm
Well lets see this is difficult question to answer oh well here I go
1) Night of the Living Dead { just to warm people up, plus you got to kick with the old school}
2) The Burning { Good ole old school Slasher}
3) Black Christmas {The original Bob Clark directed}
4) Manhattan Baby { Not the best Fulci film but its good way to gradually kick up a notch}
5) Zombie { Now were getting more serious}
6) Tenebra {Got to have some Argento}
7) Suspiria {Definatley his best work}
9) Cannibal Holocaust { Ruggero Deodato’s classic film}
10) Bay of Blood { Mario Bava classic defining giallio
11) Nekromantik { Jorge Buttergeits classic 80’s film about necrophillia}
12) August Underground Mordum {Fred Vogel’s classic snuff film}
13) Martyrs { To finish it off the classic French horror film}
Pat_Bondage said at
Jul 24 09 at
6:28 pm
The following list proves that I have NO business sequencing film festivals for profit:
1. Spider Baby (1968)
2. Paris Is Burning (1990)
3. The Gong Show Movie (1980)
4. Grey Gardens (1975)
5. Beneath the Valley of the Ultra-Vixens (1979) (narrowly beat out “Aphrodite” (1982); though I do so love to watch hip asexuals squirm during hardcore sex, this would be more fun on the BIG screen. Shit, maybe two screens at once!)
6. The Killing (1956) (Yes, it’s a bit of a cool-down after the predecessor, but then, so is ANYTHING)
7. Yojimbo (1961)
8. Here’s To Love! (2008) (the part of the fest where you tend to fall asleep anyway…plus, as good a place as any to see who here is epileptic!)
9. Savages (1972) (Zzzzzzz)
10. The 5000 Fingers of Dr. T (1953) (bring the kids!)
11. Huie’s Sermon/God’s Angry Man (both 1980) (these shorts are verifiably good breakfast fare)
12. 200 Motels (1971)
13. Pound (1970)
Sisko Tech said at
Jul 24 09 at
6:34 pm
“Who made Who” is my favorite ACDC song as well! Hate MAXIMUM OVERDRIVE with a passion, however… Proof that Stephen King should keep his day job.
And you’re right. 1968 NOTLD is the only version there is, but I’ll give Savini props for doing an excellent job on the remake in a no-win scenario. Patricia Tallman was also excellent as Barbara and that should have been her breakout.
John B said at
Jul 24 09 at
6:44 pm
BTW… Awesome list, Pat_Bondage… The August Underground movies are amazingly disturbing.
John B said at
Jul 24 09 at
7:41 pm
I would let Bobby Weird programme our ‘thon in a heartbeat. That dude has taste thats a xerox of my own. RIght down to that improbable shitter MADMAN - we use the line “He’s shreal” since seeing it decades ago.
Many of these great suggestions above we’ve played over the years. I can tell you one of the greatest experiences was seeing TORTURE DUNGEON at 5am and thinking it one of best big screen experiences I’ve ever had.
And B-Sol’s list would destroy everyone.
Ant Timpson said at
Jul 25 09 at
2:34 am
Thanks, Ant! We need a talent like yours up in this hemisphere.
mcbeardo said at
Jul 25 09 at
11:55 am
Greetings and salutations. The following is just one of the film festival schedules we came up with. We tend to overthink things like this (Reefer kills brain cells…right)
Meet the Feebles-Songs and a hippo with a machine gun. Good times.
Fiend Without a Face-Invisible fuzzy slippers with antennae
Grease 2-Just Because
Requiem for a Dream-Because other drugs are bad
Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band-The Bee Gee’s, Alice Cooper, Aerosmith, and Steve Martin. Yeah, baby!
Flash Gordon-For Max Von Sydow and the football game.
Sex Kittens go to College-Robots, monkeys, and boobs
Day of the Dead-Because people might be in a good mood right about now
Andy Warhol’s Frankenstein-Because we need one 3-D flick
Surf Nazi’s Must Die-For the title alone
Shock Treatment-Unlike Rocky Horror, it’s a good movie
Ilsa-She Wolf of the SS-We need one Ilsa flick
and we end with us doing a live riff on
Let my Puppets Come-Since we started with puppetsNamaste.
Mike & Ike said at
Jul 25 09 at
5:11 pm
Sisko, I haven’t seen a couple of your movies. I’ve got some catching up to do. And Ant, I consider that high praise. But the Madman line I love is “Maaahs! Maad-man Maaas!”
Bobby Weird said at
Jul 26 09 at
12:24 am
My dream lineup, in this order…
01. Trouble Man (1972)
02. Five Fingers of Death (1973)
03. Rolling Thunder (1977)
04. Hanzo the Razor: Sword of Justice (1972)
05. Deadly Weapons (1974)
06. Ilsa, She Wolf of the SS (1975)
07. Jackson County Jail (1976)
08. The Pom Pom Girls (1976)
09. Deadly Prey (1987)
10. For Y’ur Height Only (1981)
11. Blood Diner (1987)
12. Master of the Flying Guillotine (1975)
13. Black Shampoo (1976)
Monsieur Viker said at
Aug 07 09 at
9:24 pm
